Love dies. Relationships end. These statements are difficult to accept, but they constitute people’s daily lives. Heartbreaks are extremely painful since you invested time and effort into a relationship.
For better or worse, in most of today’s Western cultures we have immense freedom to follow our hearts’ desires when it comes to love; however, this freedom also means that we are likely to experience the loss of either a dating or marital relationship at least once in our lives—and probably more frequently. — Erica B Slotter Ph.D.
Thus, breakups are painful and mentally burdensome. You need to remove the romantic attachment you had with another person. In this time of your life, you need a support system to remind you of other great things in life.
Aside from a support system, positive self-talk is also essential when dealing with heartbreaks. Here are some powerful mantras to help you through the moving on phase.
Healing Is Not Linear
Heartbreaks are tiring since feelings of hurt, guilt, and anger always come back. You might be fine for a day, and you thought you have already moved on. But there is no guarantee that tomorrow will be like today.
However, you must accept that healing will never be linear. The beginning of happiness does not guarantee a lifetime of joy. In the same way, the start of negative feelings does not entail a lifetime of sadness. The moving on phase is an everyday challenge you will face, and you need to healthily deal with these emotions.
You can take note of happy days to remember them during times of struggle. Healing may not be linear, but joyful days make life bearable.
Research shows that one of the best self-help treatments for depression is physical exercise. Exercise produces endorphins and serotonin, which both promote a positive outlook. — Suzanne Degges-White Ph.D.
One Day At A Time
Sometimes, when things are tough, people force themselves to move on. However, most of the time, coercing yourself is counterproductive. This way of dealing with emotions involves denial and repression.
You deny your negative feelings, but you need to express these repressed emotions. If not conveyed, those negative feelings will obstruct your journey of moving on. You must feel your emotions, but you must not dwell on them.
The future will unfold by itself. Do not worry about it too much. What you need to do is to focus on yourself today. Choose to engage in healthy coping mechanisms. You can start healthy habits which can keep you busy. Focus on making yourself better each day until you realize that you have completely moved on.
The problem isn’t necessarily a lack of determination or desire. Instead, there’s a divide between our calculated intentions to achieve a goal and the feelings that tempt us to give up. — Caty Harris, LCSW
There were times when you thought you would end up with that person. However, life does not always work the way you want it to. There may be good reasons, or it may just be an unfortunate event in your life. Nevertheless, you need to stop rationalizing other people’s actions and decisions.
It is difficult to accept that your shared time is already gone, but it is the only way to move forward. You are not forced to think of this mantra immediately, but once you learn to accept some aspects of life as they are, you will unload some of the burdens you are carrying.
It might appear that you cannot move on with the pain, but, you are more powerful than you think. You are more than what that person made you feel. You are more than this heartbreak, and you will be surprised by how worthy you are.