Self-Therapy on Issues About Infidelity

A significant number of married couples are impacted by infidelity nowadays. It’s like the trend now. Or is it? How people could step out of their marriage nowadays to have an affair with another person may take a million reasons to understand the behavior fully. If you are the one being cheated on, in most people’s opinion you are not the person to blame for your partner’s act of deceit. You would, however, want to know the motivating factors or reasons that lead your spouse to this point. You might want to dig on the basic of the reasons why a spouse cheats.


Psychology dictates that the human mind only feels contentment if the cause is known to specific effects that can compromise one’s security and safety. A broken relationship caused by a philandering partner can be very damaging to one’s psychological and emotional functions. Some experts believe that one should practice self-therapy in dealing with emotional problems. In this case, finding out the reason why a spouse started to find love and attention from others can ease one’s suffering and offer closure.

When the inevitable disagreements and differences come up in a relationship, he stuffs his feelings and drifts away. He prefers email or texts when dealing with uncomfortable issues. — Diana Kirschner Ph.D.

When physical needs are not met. Believe it or not – sex still matters. When extreme responsibilities brought about by obligations bombard couples, stressful situations at work, or a child coming into the picture, the lack of physical connection in the form of sexual practice is the main reason for men to entertain other women. You may have been unaware of the signs as when frequency of physical and emotional attention is lost, when you start to lose the interest of your partner or when your life is centered around your kids while your partner is left overlooked and rejected. These kinds of neglect can make a person feel alone and unloved.


As people get closer to each other in relationship, they have a tendency to reach a point when they get scared and pull back.  Their fears of intimacy can start to turn them against themselves or their partner, and in order to create distance, they start to withhold the qualities their partner valued most. — Lisa Firestone, Ph.D.

Childhood experiences. When you were young and starved of affection, how do you bring emotional baggage in your adulthood? Have your past experiences influenced you on how to connect with your spouse? Are you very sensitive to rejection? How much security do you feel in your marriage? What about feelings of incompetency? Do you feel incapable of performing your function as a spouse? The lack of ability and power to make significant decisions in your marriage? If you were often discouraged to function independently as a child, you may have developed these incompetencies. You may have self-doubt that is strong enough to control you, making you believe that you cannot do something on your own and your spouse is more powerful than you.

Did you feel like you were loved and nurtured well in your childhood? Do you feel secure and feel that someone is always there for you? The ability to love and show intimacy to your partner can make it easy for you to connect with your spouse in your most loving way.

Take Proactive Steps To Save Your Marriage

A more profound level of commitment makes up a marriage. Choosing to love each other after all the struggles and obstacles and the willingness to compromise no matter what it takes is vital to make marriage a success. To commit is to be proactive in ways to nurture the relationship. It is constant work and will never end until death you part.


The idea that just because we want something means that we can have it is a throwback to the typical mindset of a 2-year-old who is just testing out the boundaries of her power. — Suzanne Degges-White Ph.D.

Openness and honesty in the name of love and understanding is a primal element in any relationship. Honestly towards your thoughts, feelings and any plans that you may have for both of you and your family needs to be communicated. You might want to share with your spouse as much about yourself to be accepted for who you are. When love is real, it doesn’t lie nor pretend. Love will make you feel that you are always wanted.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *